Pop ed: indiscriminate breeding 101

as an alien to this planet, i am entitled to notice that humans ridiculously spawn like zerglings. they multiply without heed to their resources. in the near hundredth future, i predict that they will eventually eat themselves out of lack of sustenance. but that is too far from reality. here’s why.

currently, there are 6.87 billion people living on the Earth. if my pencil-math is correct, every human – if they claim land as if it was so easy to just say “dibs” – can each claim about 21,600 sq. km out of this planet’s 1.49 million sq. km land area. this would be an awesome number but who would call dibs on the Sahara? or Antarctica? (i’d call dibs on Harry Potter’s World). geohive.com estimates that in 40 years, the earth’s population will be around 10 billion people. thank your god/s for condominiums. oh wait…

i remembered. i just saw something online about a health worker teaching sex workers how to avoid the i-won’t-wear-a-condom talk with a client. it’s terribly educational. and hilarious. and slightly unsafe for work. unless, you’re the sex worker – this is your webinar. quiz after video.

 

So so

so i lingered temporarily out of orbit and i wandered a bit too far off the milky way. i had been train spotting procrastination into my system and it  took me a long time to open my eye because of the glare when I went too close to the sun. being a one eyed wonder has its disadvantages.  for one, you’re instantly blind when someone pokes you once.

im getting off topic.

the thing is, my disc lost wifi when i was orbiting past the star system where Alderon once belonged to before it was blasted to smithereens. I guess planetary remains are not radio-friendly.

nah. i was just being a lazy alien with a bigger belly. i guess right now i’m just making excuses not to look at things which, is the whole point of this blog so if you think you’ll get something good out of this post, good luck.

ps. i wanted to wink but having one eye does not really do me any good.

The color green

it had been a wonderful time going home. since broadband and blogging is so last week in my galaxy, i am unable to post something wonderful, which is kinda often being the lazy monster that i am.

i had been lucky enough to witness a huge rainbow a few days ago. what with all the smog, rainbows are very hard to witness nowadays on this planet. despite the knowledge of refraction and light rays hitting water droplets in the sky, it is still fascinating  how the earth’s magnificence unleashes its beauty right before your eye (plural if you’re human).

of course, due to global warming and air pollution, the very idea of rainbows seem inexistent nowadays. the humans seem indifferent about their planet anyway. i can always go back to my own should this earth be buried in its waste but i intend to do something. this alien shall not allow this earth to be a graveyard of the living.

please let this alien know what he can do.

Fight or Flight – how heroes become super

i had always been fascinated by comic books. humans are so into superheroes. they dream of having superhuman capabilities that would separate them from their race. who doesn’t want to fly (my disc does that for me), of walk through walls (smells like trespassing) or super strength. now i don’t know about flying. i guess humans are incapable of flying without any contraptions unless they breed with birds or walking through walls, that sounds like poltergeist conspiracies to me. but superhuman strength is possible in their realm.

why is it that humans can lift refrigerators, cars or their mothers and run miles when in danger or in a catastrophe? and why can’t they replicate it afterwards? simple. they call it the fight or flight response. i remembered the time i first set foot on earth after having landed in a field and seen by this male human who wore a funny straw head gear. he remained frozen on the spot for around five seconds then ran as fast as a leopard on sprint. i originally noted humans to be fast sprinters then found out that they can’t even run from their own wives. that was my first encounter with fight or flight.

some accounts report that humans can lift heavy objects and throw them when in a stress-induced incident, like fires. at some point, the brain controls that niche in your cranium and activates all the processes needed to release the needed strength. your heart pumps more blood, pupils dilate, and reflexes accelerate. all of this makes it favorable for accurate movement.

so why can’t humans have this extra strength all the time?

simple. they will die. like all matter in this multiverse, all need balance. human bodies need to achieve homeostasis and a body forever in excited state may well get weary and the immune system may get weakened over long periods of stress. until humans lift buildings as a normal daily routine, their genes are in a long way to evolving into superman’s.